Low and behold I have found the Christmas spirit, hiding in a dim corner of my mind where I haven't visited in years. It is warm and smells of cider; it is unbearable. I quickly leave and return to thoughts that only slow me down. There is a sort of comfort in disappointing people around you; once there is nothing left people don't expect anything from you. It is a relief, a weight off of your shoulders. But that kind of ruthless act of selfishness takes courage that most don't have. Others would rather sit in a puddle of their unhappiness and splash complaints around that reveal truer emotions. My advice is to say fuck it all. Be courageous and take that leap of faith to the other side, a place where you and only you matter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlkTmdF0tT4